How I learned how to live life to the fullest, and on my terms.

By Shoshana Jackson

For many years of my life, I did not live life the way I wanted. In fact I didn’t even know what I wanted in life, and wasn’t sure I would ever know.

I’ve met many people who felt the same way. They’ve never discovered what they want in life.

It’s a shame to let that happen.

I’ve known people who have spent the best years of their life doing things they dislike. Working jobs they hate. Having relationships with people they loathe. Spending time with people who don’t love or respect them for who they are.

Many people die at twenty five and aren’t buried until they are seventy five. Benjamin Franklin

No one should suffer through living as a living zombie in an unfulfilling life. Especially when there’s something you can do about it.

The way to live life to the fullest is to decide what you want in life.

This isn’t as easy as it sounds. In my life this step involved a lot of trial and error. I was unsure of what I wanted in life. I had goals, but many of those goals were not truly mine.

How many of your goals were placed there by other people. Think about it, as children we’re told by our family, society and our peers that there are certain things we should want in life.

• College
• Careers
• Relationships
• Social Status
• Marriage
• Children
• Possessions

Then there are the goals placed on you by circumstances and events in your life. In the end you’re letting these things determine your future. They drive your actions and in the end determine your future.

Unfortunately if these things are not what you want, you’re not living life to the fullest. In order to do that you need to set definite goals of your own. You need to start deciding what YOU want in life.

If you’re not sure what you want in the beginning, don’t worry. Like I said it took a while for me to find my own life’s purpose. Here are a few ways to help you learn how to live life to the fullest and claim your own life’s goals.

To learn how to live life to the fullest you need to stop looking in your head and start looking in your heart.

I’m a somewhat logical person, so this was difficult for me. Every time I thought about something I wanted to do, I would instantly begin calculating the costs and the possibility of it succeeding and failing.

While it’s important to use your head when looking at a business venture, it doesn’t work so well when trying to decide how you want to live your life. In fact it can keep you “stuck” where you are right now, because you’d be less likely to take chances.

I had to realize that there are many definitions of success and happiness. They can’t all be measured with a paycheck or possessions. If you let these things influence your decisions you’re not listening to your heart.

You need to listen to the little voice that whispers the things that are important. The other voices will be shouting for you to find stability and safety. However this little voice will tell you what your true passions are. This is the voice you should listen to.

After your heart has told you what you want in life and what your passions are, then you need to start planning with your head.

Live completely in the head and you cannot feel the breath and rhythm of life. Live completely in the heart and you may find yourself acting like a love-struck fool with poor judgment and discipline. It’s all a fine balance – the head and heart must forge a lifetime partnership if one wants to live a beautiful life. Rumi

There’s a quote by Elbert Hubbard, “A goal without a plan is a dream” If you stop at learning your passion, you will most likely never accomplish what you want. Unfortunately planning goals is one of the most difficult things for many people to do.

Every year millions of people make their annual goals list (New Year’s Resolutions) and most never accomplish anything on that list. It’s a wish list, a dream list, but rarely is it a goal list.

To make it a goal you have to consider what you want and give yourself a deadline for accomplishing it. That deadline will dictate when you have to accomplish certain steps to ensure the goal will be completed.

Just be warned don’t fall into the trap that caught me. It’s nice to plan, in fact you can spend so much time planning that you never get anything accomplished. Some people spend all of their time figuring out what to do and get “stuck.

While your head and heart work together to teach you how to live life to the fullest, let your instincts guide you on the right path.

Most people are taught from a young age to not trust their instincts. With all of the external influences we have in our lives, parents, friends, family, peers, authority figures, the internet and TV, who needs to think for themselves.

Well, you do. If you want to live your life to the fullest.

If you want to follow everyone else of course you don’t need to guide yourself on the right path, because you’re being led down one chosen for you.

Now I’m not saying your instincts won’t lead you astray, however it’s better to make your own mistake than to let someone else make a mistake at your expense. You’ll make errors, everyone does, I have and so have many other successful people.

It’s from your mistakes that you learn what works for you and how to live the life you want to live.

• So, push aside the naysayers in your life.
• Stop trying to keep up with the Jones’.
• Don’t listen to the authority figures who say there’s only a few ways to be a success.
• Don’t listen to the people who say you’re too old or too young to have the life you want.

Age is not measured by years. Nature does not equally distribute energy. Some people are born old and tired while others are going strong at seventy.
Dorothy Thompson

 

I’ve decided what I want, I’m following my heart, making plans and listening to my instincts, and I know I’ll get the life I want and I know you can too.